Last week: Felix trashtalked Liz in style forum, and soon after left. Proving that, the more you trash talk about Liz, the more Tommy hates you. Aside from that, nobody really cares what happens. Oh well. Who will win the grand prize tonight?
This week, we start off with a recap of EVERY SINGLE WEEK OF THE SHOW. AAAAAAAHHH!!! Tommy voices the whole thing over, as expected. He must really like hearing his own voice. I, however, can’t take it anymore. Thank goodness this is the LAST EPISODE EVER! *yelps for joy*
After we get through that madness and a commercial break, we launch into everyone being über happy that they got to the final three. Everyone, that is, except for Princess. It appears that Princess is now on fire because Liz is still there. She gets herself pretty worked up, and I think I see fire in her eyes. So this must be what she means when she says that she’s on fire. I’m surprised that she hasn’t started to implode yet. I mean, when you’ve got that much fire inside of you... it’s gotta get out somehow. Maybe it escapes during her angry fist-hitting-open-hand action. That must be it.
The next morning, Tommy meets Princess, Chris, and Liz in Macy’s, which, as well all know (well, we all know now after seeing that big-ass sign on the front of the store), is the biggest store in the WORLD! As Tommy fills us in, it’s also where Tommy began his lifestyle brand that had his name on it, because, well... he does what he wants. Tommy then tells them that they will be making their own lifestyle brand and advertising it in a Macy’s store window... with a little help from some friends. Soon, all of the ex-contestants come down an elevator, and the three remaining contestants begin to cry. Heck, they even cry and hug Amy when they see her. I don’t even remember Amy. I don’t think I could tell you what she sounded like. Once they all gather, Tommy tells the remaining three that they will each be picking two people to help them in the task. Aw, how cute. It’s like Designer Softball or something. Liz picks first, and chooses Wes. Chris’ first choice is James, and Princess’ first choice is Rob Walker. For the second round, Elizabeth chooses Felix, Chris chooses Deanna, and Princess’ last pick is Silent Chris. For Princess’ last choice, I must say: WHAAA?? Did Chris do anything worthwhile on this show? I would have forgotten who he was had he not come up with an idea one time.
The next few shots involve Liz spitting out her ideas to Felix and Wes and them picking up where she left off and making her idea into something feasible. Next, it’s Princess’ turn, except that since she’s gotten the two silent invisible types, so she’s pretty much telling them her ideas and they’re nodding. I think that Rob actually tries to say something once, but he gets about 5 words out before Princess starts spewing again. Silly Princess. Over on Chris’ side, James mentions that working for Tommy is Chris’ dream, and Chris mentions that he previously worked at Macy’s and his dream was to do a window in the store. Deanna starts off by saying that Chris is like a little kid and it’s so exciting to watch him come up with all of his ideas. Then he says something very strange – the most oxymoronical part of it involved some bad-ass tweeds – and she adds that sometimes he’s a little too ADD. In other words, he’s fierce, but not able to control his fierceness. And he also hasn’t perfected the smarmy look of attitude, so of course Deanna’s going to look down on him. What else would you expect?
After a commercial break, Chris, Deanna, and Princess briefly meet with J. Lo. J.Lo pretends like she knows what’s going on and nods her head enough to where I’m expecting those gigantic hoop earrings to rip themselves out of her ears. The contestants ask their production approved questions to J.Lo, and she answers them before using the lame “I have to go back to work” excuse. C’mon, she’s J.Lo. Work? Just look at the rocks that she’s got. You can’t tell me she’s just a regular ol’ Jenny from the block.. Yeesh.
On Chris’ team, James, Chris and Deanna begin work on Chris’ vision – apparently, he wants a tornado in his window. What tornadoes have to do with clothes is beyond me. I mean, really, when was the last time that you saw a tornado wearing a lifestyle brand? Never? I thought so. Over on Liz’s side, Felix and Wes are getting a wee fed up with Liz’s inability to decide. On anything. If she had a choice between eating a five course meal and snausages, she would actually entertain the thought of eating snausages. That’s just how wishy-washy she is. Wes mentions that without him and Felix, there is no way in heck that Liz will win. For the first time, I actually agree with Wes. Amazing. Over on Princess’ side, she drops some mannequins off to get cleaned. Joy. She also grabs some glass buttons for something that will be “banging”. We go back to Liz momentarily as she gets Miss Jenny to, yet again, pretty much do all of the work for her. As usual, they play the “look at this stupid lady” music. I laugh.
Back in the realm of Princess, it appears that there is a little dilemma – that mannequin store took her mannequins. As expected, Princess is – wait for it, wait for it, wait for it – ON FIRE! EN FUEGO! WHATEVER ON FIRE IS IN FRENCH! WE KNOW, PRINCESS! WE KNOW! AND WE NO LONGER CARE IF YOU’RE ON FIRE OR NOT! WE DON’T CARE!
*breathes*
Luckily for Princess, she runs across a company that, upon seeing the pretty cameras, jumps at the opportunity to give her some mannequins. They also give her a furry jacket. And thus, Princess cools off. Thank gawd. Afterwards, we get a little “I am motivated!” montage from Princess and Chris. Liz isn’t included in this montage because... well... she’s not really that motivated. Oh well.
The next morning, the teams arrive at the windows in order to make their visions become reality. Well, they try to, at least. Of course, this being The Cut, nobody actually has everything prepared until there are about ten minutes to spare. Liz actually doesn’t have her dresses in until they’ve got about three minutes before the deadline. Once it’s time, Tommy comes with special guest... supermodel Naomi Campbell! Yes, apparently it’s not important that someone who, say, has actually created a lifestyle brand is with Tommy – he’s just interested in letting the world know that he’s friends with Naomi Campbell. Hopefully she hasn’t thrown a phone at him. Yet.
After Naomi and Tommy look at all of the pretty windows and the contestants yet again reiterate how happy they are to be there, it’s time for the... FINAL STYLE FORUM! I have been waiting for this moment for about 15 weeks. Finally. It’s almost over!
Tommy starts off by saying that him and Naomi agreed on what they saw, but that he’s still going to need some help. Cue all of the ex-participants walking back down the runway. Wow, that wasn’t expected. At all. Soon Tommy gives his opinions on the designs that he sees. Liz’s designs are rather bland and boring, which is a surprise because she was on fire (in the Tommy sense, not in the Princess sense). Tommy says that he likes Princess’ designs, although they’d all be hard to mass produce, and that he likes what he can see from Chris, but not everyone can afford Kashmir. Really? I did not know that. Thus... Liz is the first one tonight to be cut. Still no surprises... Now that it’s down to Chris and Princess. In an expected move, Tommy begins to ask what the ex-contestants think of the designs. Felix is impressed with Chris’ design, and Jeff says that he would sell it like mad. Amy says that she’d “gravitate” towards Princess’ designs, as would Vlada (using the exact same word “gravitate”. Yikes.) Deanna, the final one to have a say, likes Chris better. In the end, Tommy tells Chris that he is.... IN STYLE! In the cheapest of cheap endings, there’s no confetti and I see no balloons, and instead of Chris jumping up and down he just stands there and shakes peoples’ hands. I’m personally jumping up and down, not because Chris won, but because THE GODFORSAKEN SHOW IS OVER! WOOOOHOOO! MY LAST RECAP FOR THIS SHOW EVER!!!!!
So, to close the season, I suppose that Chris probably should have won. He was, after all, the head honcho visionary. You could really tell that he wanted to have Tommy’s babies. And all of his idol worship finally paid off. Good luck to him in the future. And thank goodness I won’t have to see anymore Tommy Reality TV.
Do you know what snausages are? Do you care? If so, e-mail me at boredsim133@yahoo.com. You can also send me donations for the psychiatric help that I’m going to need after watching a season of this god awful show
Way to sum of the finale bored. :laugh
IT wasn't that bad was it? Granted there were a couple of episodes I could have lived without, but all in all not bad. I predicted from the get-go the the kid dressed from head to toe Tommy would be in it. It's too bad he really had no fashion sense. He'll probably end up being Tommy's walking mannequin for the next year to earn his $250,000.